For quite some time now, I’ve been stuck in an unfortunate dating pattern. It looks something like this:
(Repeat a million times)
I’ve seen every first date horror that there is….and some that I never even knew existed. There was the starving artist who invited me to watch a movie at his place, and I learned that his place is a hole of an apartment with a mattress on the floor of the living room and a tv sitting on top of a few crates. The bathroom was unspeakable. There was the awkward guy who couldn’t carry a conversation and showed up with the red and white teddy bear that was holding a picture frame. “What was in the picture frame?” you ask. A picture of (wait for it…) him. Yes. A little teddy bear that looked like it was a consolation prize from a state fair or a winning item from a quarter-claw-machine that was holding a picture frame with a picture of him in the frame. There was the guy who got super drunk and took over the dance floor with ridiculous dance moves…embarrassing me to the point that I never wanted to return to the Firehouse Lounge again, (thank goodness it closed…I still think his drunken dance moves contributed to this bar’s demise…sorry Firehouse Lounge.) and then groped me the whole way back to the car. There was the loud laugher in the movies…who laughed SO loudly at ever single joke that I was mortified when the lights came on and people saw that I was with him. On top of all of these stories there are countless awkward pauses upon the arrival of the dinner check, many unwelcome goodnight kisses, and infinite unnecessary conversations about evil ex-girlfriends and baby mamas that simply made the nights unbearable.
Some of these have been blind dates. Some are men who I have met around town. I meet them here and there…and all of the first dates are just horrible. How I long for the first dates of my past-the guy who met me at a local café where we talked until they closed…and then walked me to my car where we
talked for another hour…and then told me that he didn’t want the night to end, so we went to a 24-hour diner and talked and laughed for hours more. When I finally arrived home, it was 4 AM and I was on cloud nine. Or the guy who ended the night with the sweetest kiss on the forehead, telling me that he
couldn’t wait to see me again, texting me five minutes after the date ended to again tell me how much fun he had. And the sweet guy who opened all of doors, asked me what I wanted to drink and ordered it for me, and taught me how to improve my pool shot. These were fun first dates that all led to second
dates. These guys didn’t have to try hard…they did not drink too much, or bring cheesy gifts. They didn’t put out any sleazy moves, and they were gentleman. These dates ended with giddy calls to my best friend, telling her how sweet/cute/fantastic the guy seemed, with excitement for date # 2.
Oh how I long for a guy worthy of date #2. There have been so many 1 date wonders that I’m beginning to forget what date #2 feels like. I have started to forget the excitement of getting ready for date #2.
You want to look just as cute as you did for date #1, but there is a bit less pressure, because you know that he likes what he sees. Your mind races when you think about the kiss that likely comes from date #2…either because it didn’t come from the first date, or if it did, because you want to have that kiss
again. Date #2 is a sign that this could perhaps go somewhere…after all, it could have ended after the first date, but you’ve both decided that you want more. You may not have told your friends about the first date, because you weren’t sure what to expect, but they know about date #2.
This past weekend I went on two dates…both were first dates. One fell right in line with my pattern of lousy first dates. There will be no second date with this guy. The other…was different. It fell more into the category of the first dates of my past. The guy was sweet and good looking. We had a great time,
and date #2 is already scheduled. It appears as though this man has broken my Habitual First Dater pattern, which makes me wonder-will there be a date #3?
What is your worst first date story?